Wednesday, March 26, 2014


The forest moon of Endor. This seems like a great place to live, the scariest things on it are Ewoks so there is no real sense of danger. I lived most of my life in the forest state of Pennsylvania so I feel a transition to Endor's forest moon would be pretty simple, it's practically the same place. If you ever had a tree house growing up as I did, then you know how cool it would be to live in a tree house community! Besides all that, Ewoks really know how to party. 

Duckburg, perfect place for race cars, lasers, and aeroplanes, it's a duck blur. Might solve a mystery, or rewrite history, in Duckburg! With Uncle Scrooge's money bin as a beautiful backdrop, I would love living in this thriving city of cartoon animals! Plus the city is protected by Gizmo-duck and that is something that would help me sleep at night.

The ice planet of Hoth. Now HERE is a place that an Alaskan such as myself can really enjoy! The frozen icy wasteland would make a perfect home for me. Nothing but snow for as far as the eye can see! I would get some sled dogs, build myself an igloo, establish a rebel base, and I'm all set! How romantic would a one horse open sleigh ride through the ice fields be?? Every Christmas would be a white Christmas....think about it.

In contrast, I would NOT like to live on Tatooine. Nothing but hot blowing desert sand, moisture farms, dune seas, and controlled by gangsters makes this two sun having planet a no-go for me! Sand would get in your food and your underwear and little creatures would constantly be trying to steal your droids or speeders not to mention one of the universe's worst villains ever was born there. Two suns??!! Can you imagine two suns!?!? Forget that place. These are my own opinions but I'd like to point out that Luke Skywalker agrees with me.

Ask me if I'd like to live in the Emerald City, go ahead! Let me remind you of the information you can gather from the lyrics the citizens of Emerald City sang to Dorothy and her friends. "We get up at twelve, start to work by one, take an hour for lunch, and by two we're done." Are you serious?? I can totally get in on that shit. That happy lazy attitude makes the Emerald City in the land of Oz my number one destination! Plus it's ruled by a great and powerful wizard, has a massive protective wall with a guard, horses that can change color, and NO witches! Also I like green. Punch my ticket now! 

The Shire in Middle Earth. Now where else can you find a place as peaceful and laid back as this? A nice green sunny place to sit around and eat several breakfasts where nothing exciting ever happens, sounds just perfect to me. Love the round doors and gardens as well. Everyone is related to each other just like a Southern redneck town so you know you'll have decent neighbors. Ah yes, the Shire is definitely a place I could call home. 

Once they kick me out of the Shire, I'd try to find an apartment in downtown Rivendell! Talk about a classy place! Look at the craftsmanship on these buildings! Elves give a lot of attention to detail, and it shows! Getting in may be a bit difficult if you're not an elf, (my only flaw as a human btw). It's more of a gated community and I assume they screen their residents. 

The planet of Thundera would have been a great place to live! Such a perfect climate that clothes were not needed. The Eye of Thundera, the source of the Thundercat's powers, slept peacefully and unneeded, as there was no evil on the entire planet! Protected by Jaga the wise and ruled by the great King Clawdus, and his son, the next Lord of the Thundercats, Lion-o, things looked bright for this Utopia. BUT it exploded in the first episode of Thundercats, making its inhabitants wondering refugees in search of a new planet. Really sucks. 

Planet Arus always looked like a nice place to me. I know King Zarkon laid waste to this peaceful planet full of the top scientsts in our galaxy but luckily for me the Voltron Force and Princess Allura helped to bring back Voltron! I'm sure I could get a job working in the castle of lions or something. Besides, having the defender of the universe parked in your driveway makes a guy feel safe to walk down the street!

Gotham City, a place that comes with the protection of Batman yes, but when you really stop and think about it, this place SUCKS! Don't even bother considering this city as a place to go, the thought of Batman may be comforting at first, but then think about all the criminals that call Gotham home. The Penguin, The Riddler, The Joker, Catwoman, Poison Ivy, Bane, Mr. Freeze, Two-Face, The Scarecrow, major crime bosses, a corrupted city government and a gangster controlled police force, the list goes on. Sure Batman has been doing a pretty good job so far but at the end of the day he's just a guy in a suit and that's not good enough for this crime infested dump.

To my shock and horror, I found out Hazzard County Georgia does not exist, and no matter how much wishing I did, it never became a real place. I would really consider calling Hazzard home! It's quiet there, people get along, sure there is a corrupted local government but unless your last name is Duke, they seem to leave you alone for the most part. I would get a little farm on the outskirts of town and drive my Dodge Charger around all day and then head to the Boar's Nest bar for a beer to end my day. (Really planned for this to be my life when I was 5 years old)

When the cartoon He-man ended, the company needed a new series and they created Bravestarr. Oddly enough, it takes place on Planet Texas. It was pretty much a space version of Texas and since I live in Texas now and the only difference would be lasers and talking robotic half haman/half horses, I think I would fit in pretty well.  

The Planet of the Apes doesn't sound so bad, I mean if you can get past all the crap flinging that probably goes on there and all the discrimination and racial profiling you'd receive for just being a human. Wait a minute......statue of Liberty.....that was OUR PLANET! YOU MANIACS, YOU BLEW IT UP, DAMN YOU, DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!!! *cries*

Out of every place I can think of, the most logical place for me to live would be planet Vulcan.

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